|
Name:
|
Tanya |
Posted:
|
Nov 29, 2008 |
|
Location:
|
ottawa |
|
| just thinking about Sasha's visit up here to Ottawa.. must have been in 1998, but it seems so much closer in time. It was such fun, and I thought it would be the first of many. I am thinking of you Marina, Park and Nick, and want to say how much I admire/learn from how you have dealt with this, the wonderful things you have all written about love, and Nick's wonderful piece on delight. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Anna N Lary |
Posted:
|
Nov 26, 2008 |
|
Location:
|
Vancouver |
|
| My first memories of Sasha are of her as a baby, of her lying in a car seat(?) with a string of green plastic beads. When ever I saw her she seemed so different from the last time. I glimsped her life in snapshots. She was beautiful, funny and I would have liked to have spent more time with her.
As a mother, I have a only a small window into what you must feel. I love you both, Anna |
|
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|
Name:
|
diana |
Posted:
|
Nov 25, 2008 |
|
Location:
|
quanzhou, China |
|
| Dearest Marina and Park,
I've ben thinking of yo as Sasha's birthday draws near. I know it will be both sad and sweet for you, but I want you to know that far away someone is thinking of you, and hoping that you will have happy memories of Sasha on her birthday.
with much love
Diana |
|
|
|
Name:
|
David |
Posted:
|
Dec 4, 2007 |
|
Location:
|
Biddeford, Maine |
|
| Happy Birthday, Sasha. We miss you!! |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Marina |
Posted:
|
Nov 28, 2007 |
|
Location:
|
Ashland, Oregon |
|
| Sasha was born 30 years ago today. It was a very wintry, snowy day in Syracuse, NY. I remember being so in awe of her and full of love for this unique and exquisite tiny little being. That love glows in my heart today and every day. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Amy |
Posted:
|
Sep 18, 2007 |
|
Location:
|
MA |
|
| I didn't know Sasha well at all at Hamilton. In fact, I think I only spoke to her once. She was one of the senior tutors when I began working at the Writing Center. I remember thinking she was so wise and self-assured for someone only a few years older than me. Her passing, which I learned of from the alumni magazine back in 2000, was a shock to me. At 21, I was not in the habit of contemplating my own or anyone else's mortality. I'm not sure what made me think of Sasha yesterday, but she popped into my head and I was sure that there had to be some sort of site devoted to her memory. And there was. It was a pleasure to learn a little more about her, and to marvel at what an impression she made on me so many years ago. -Amy |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Sharon Bywater |
Posted:
|
Aug 20, 2007 |
|
Location:
|
Carlsbad, California |
|
| Remembering Sasha:
My first memories of Sasha are when she was an infant in Syracuse, New York. She may not have been aware that she was present at my first wedding. That was October 1977 in Skaneateles. We went back to the Skaneateles Inn for dinner when Sasha was only a few months old. We wondered how she would like dining out at such a young age, and she surprised us by sleeping soundly. Even when she was very young, I remember her intelligent curiousity and good nature. She was both funloving and serious.
I wish I had know her better. I visited all of you once when you lived near Boston. Sasha must have been about seven or eight. She was excited to have a new brother. Nick was a baby, crawling on the floor. One morning, Sasha and I braved the crazy Boston commuters to go on a walking tour of the old part of town near Faneuil Hall. It was a cold morning, but she was cheerful and patient at the sometimes too long explanations of the tour guide. She seemed genuinely interested, something that amazed me in one so young. I mainly remember that we both had a really good time.
I lost track of all of you for many years. Then, suddenly, there you were Marina, saying "Sharon" at intermission of a performance of The Tempest in Ashland. And there was Park, smiling. What a nice reunion. My memories of Sasha are as a child, and I'm just getting to know about the wonderful young woman she became. I consider it a gift that I met you two again, and that you have allowed me to share in your memories of Sasha. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Shana |
Posted:
|
May 21, 2007 |
|
Location:
|
Topsham, ME |
|
| This morning, for the first time in years, I visited a UU church where I really felt at home. The minister made me smile, think, and feel. And the last time I had that experience, it was at a time when Sasha and I were very close, and we shared many experiences, thoughts, feelings, and memories together. Every Christmas Eve, I visit First Parish Church in Framingham, and every year, tears well up in my eyes when I go in, because I can see and hear Sasha in the meeting house. She has been on my mind quite a bit lately, and as we approach another anniversary, it is another opportunity to remember Sasha and to cherish her. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
David |
Posted:
|
Nov 28, 2006 |
|
Location:
|
Biddeford, ME |
|
| Yesterday was Sasha's birthday and my thoughts have been on her life and
the remembrance of the happy Thanksgivings with Sasha, Nicki, Park and
Marina. Sasha still lives in our hearts and minds. She always will!
(Thanks, David. The site is working again. Marina) |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Scott |
Posted:
|
Dec 4, 2005 |
|
Location:
|
Michigan (FHS class of '95) |
|
| I was deeply saddened to hear of Sasha's passing...although we were never a big part of each other's lives, I could tell she was an extremely special person. Every once in a while I grab my Class of 1995 yearbook from Framingham HS, and flip through, just to stir up some old memories. Then, I come to the great article Sasha had written about President Clinton's trip to the FHS gymnasium...it will be that much more special the next time I read it...my deepest sympathies to all of her friends and family...
Scott |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Nick |
Posted:
|
Jun 16, 2005 |
|
Location:
|
Housatonic, MA |
|
I wrote this letter today to a friend of mine who is a professor at the school I work for. I would not have learned these things if I had not known my sister.
(I've omitted the opening and a few names.)
I was thinking today about delight and education, and fear, and I wanted
to share some thoughts with you. This morning I was thinking about why
I would want to spend time with other people--what is missing when there
are no people, and what is most distressing when it cannot be shared
with people who are there. I thought back to my best memories,
realizing that they were all--in different ways, but of the same
essence--memories of shared delight. It is hard to find people with
whom this is possible, or with whom it is possible to share what one
finds most delightful. I think this has something to do with how afraid
people are, in a general sense; I cannot be delighted in an activity if
instead I am concerned that someone might be watching me, that they would
think bad thoughts about me for delighting in my activity. If I cannot
delight, there is nothing to share; if I can delight, it must be
perceived by someone who also will not fear--otherwise there is no
possibility of sharing.
There is little to live for if I cannot experience delight, if I
cannot smile at the joy of sharing my delight with another. What is
love if not the warmth that we experience at the relieving and
reassuring joy of showing our delight and being seen, and understood,
and seeing joy in the face of another person? How important it is to
know that we are not wrong to be happy!
It seems to me that if one believes in these things, that if one
considers them of great importance, there is a contradiction in the
educational institution: How can I share my new understanding, share my
delight with a professor if instead of earnestly anticipating and
caring whether he will laugh or cry or smile at what I have written, I
anticipate how I will be judged for what I have done? Certainly it is
possible to participate fearlessly in a formal education--to cast aside
cares about grades, credits, attendance, one's career or "future"--but
why does the institution not encourage this fearlessness? Why does
our school encourage fear over delight? If we have fear, we will say
and do worthless things. In delight there is the possibility of
greatness.
I thought of writing to you because just before writing I was talking
about this, listening to someone talk about being told by a professor,
when one is trying not to be afraid, that one is not living up to one's
potential (it is not that I think you have said this to me that made me
think of you, I promise that.). I thought, and said: I have said to
people before: yes, I am living up to my potential--I am building my
potential, and I am trying to share that with you--you may not be
living up to your potential as a teacher. How hard it is to find those
with whom one can be candid; such things must be couched in niceness,
etc. And I thought to myself, you are one of those few people I
know who understands that there is love in anything said with integrity.
I hope that this finds you well.
Your friend,
Nick |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Tanya |
Posted:
|
May 25, 2005 |
|
Location:
|
Ottawa |
|
| I just looked up through the site and saw some lovely poems posted by others, and was prompted to look this up. It's from Raymond Carver, who died of lung cancer, and it's in his book 'A New Path to the Waterfall', which has some very moving work about his illness.
Late Fragment
And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?
I did.
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.
I sent Sasha some of these poems before her death, after she had been told that there was no hope, and i think she found them helpful.
It is a beautiful spring day here, and i find it easier to believe in a unifying presence, to think that those we have lost have not lost us, but are watching from a distance.
To Sasha, beloved on the earth. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
diana |
Posted:
|
May 24, 2005 |
|
Location:
|
vancouver |
|
| I have been thinking of Sasha and of you all day. I hope that the sadness of the anniversary may be accompanied with thoughts of what a wonderful person Sasha was, and of how much she meant to her family and friends.
I thought of you all last week too. I was in Quanzhou (Fujian), where my colleague Wang Linamao, who lost his son four years ago, is. He sent you his very best wishes, and asked me to tell you that even though you are in different places, speak different languages, and have never met, he feels connected to you by your common loss, and sends you his warmest wishes.
We celebrated Mabel's first birthday yesterday, a day early. This is another kind of very special connection with Sasha, and with all of you.
with all my love
Diana |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Marina |
Posted:
|
May 1, 2005 |
|
Location:
|
|
|
Park and I have been in Brunswick, Georgia, for several months, living on our boat. Esther and Liz are neighbors on our dock and have been living here for several years. They are quite involved with the community and, when I found out that they were volunteers for the American Cancer Society's Relay for Life, I asked them if they would have a luminaria lit for us in memory of Sasha. After the event, Liz recounted how she experienced a shiver of awe when she discovered that Sasha's luminaria (one of well over a thousand) randomly ended up right in front of her fundraising table.
Esther sent us the following poem, along with the picture of Sasha's luminaria:
If I should go before the rest of you,
Break not a flower nor erect a stone,
Nor speak about me in a "Sunday" voice,
But be the usual folk that I have known.
Weep if you must - parting is hell -
But life goes on - so sing as well. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Robin |
Posted:
|
Jan 23, 2005 |
|
Location:
|
Malden |
|
| 'Anything, anywhere
I would give everything I own away
Always I will sing
Picturing you singing right back to me'
[melissa ferrick-anything anywhere]
|
|
|
|
Name:
|
Rebecca |
Posted:
|
Jan 3, 2005 |
|
Location:
|
Gaithersburg, MD |
|
| Today I'm remembering the KDO dinner/Christmas party we had at the retaurant/bar/hotel in Ginny's old town. It was early December 1998 I think. We had the place nearly to ourselves and made quite a scene, of course, playing the jukebox all night and dancing up a storm. We gave Sasha a huge bouquet of roses that night, I still look at the pictures and you can hardly see tiny Sasha behind all those roses she's holding.
I have a box where I keep all of my "Sasha things", pictures and letters mostly, and the dried flower from her funeral. For months after her death I kept that box next to my bed, and looked through it almost every day, and cried almost every day. Nowadays, every few months I sit down on the floor and go through the box and tell my husband all the same stories and memories, and I still cry but I smile and laugh a lot more in the telling of those stories.
Sasha, I miss you and I love you dearly. Your memory lives on in the minds and hearts of those who loved you, and even in the thoughts of those who never had the pleasure. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
cleveland |
Posted:
|
Dec 6, 2004 |
|
Location:
|
Milford, NH |
|
| On the ledge in my office I still keep the negatives Sasha shot
more than 4 years ago of the Lyndeborough woman and her
lizards and, for some reason, I looked at them again tonight,
though of her, and thought I'd let you know. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Marina |
Posted:
|
Nov 27, 2004 |
|
Location:
|
aboard Om Sweet Om, Brunswick, Georgia |
|
| Today, it would have been Sasha's 27th birthday. I was at a loss as to how to spend her birthday. What should I do? What would be meaningful? Park reminded me with his usual good sense that Sasha would want me to enjoy myself.
We are in Georgia now and decided to go visit the Okefenokee Swamp (what a name!...it means "land of the trembling earth"). We saw our first ever alligators there. Upon our return to Brunswick, we decided to go to our favorite restaurant. The chef came over to chat with us. She told us her name is Alix and she then said something about Nicholas and Alexandra and that she had just hired someone called Sasha. It seems to me that there is a message there.
I have just lit a candle. Sasha, sweetheart, Happy Birthday! I love you, I love you, I love you.
|
|
|
|
Name:
|
Charlotte |
Posted:
|
Oct 24, 2004 |
|
Location:
|
Dublin, Ireland |
|
| I am thinking of Sasha and all of you around the time of her birthday.
Funny all this stuff about the frogs: in nursery school, aged maybe three, it was such a big deal to get these fancy coloured, padded frog stickers with moving eyes from my American cousin. I brought them in to show off and one was lost. The others went onto my chest-of-drawers, and they are still on it although my mum uses it now. I have no idea why they were so important to me, but as Sasha was so young herself it might have been hard for her to part with them! |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Marina |
Posted:
|
Jul 18, 2004 |
|
Location:
|
Aboard Om Sweet Om, St. Augustine |
|
Fran,
I don't know whether you will visit this site again, but in case you do I want you to know that I am incredibly touched by your message. Actually, words are completely failing me at the moment. God bless you, your beautiful Bella and your husband. With love, Marina
This year as the date of the 4th anniversary of Sasha's death approached I felt waves of emotions building up, as I have with each anniversary. But I thought...why am I allowing myself to sink into the memories of 4 years ago?...why not treat this day, May 24th, as a day in itself, a new day?...why not try, as Sasha entreated, "Live each day to the fullest. Live"? I tried, but I got caught up in trying to treat it as an ordinary day. It's not an ordinary day and never will be. This realization hit me with a force the next day when I found out that my niece, Anna, gave birth to a baby girl on May 24th. There is a sweetness to the day...Live! |
|
|
|
Name:
|
fran |
Posted:
|
Jul 3, 2004 |
|
Location:
|
new jersey |
|
| found this site accidently (if that's possible) I've a beautiful, inquizative 9 year old daughter...lately I want to run away from home as she & my husband are driving me crazy, but after realizing thru your site how precious a child is I see I am being selfish and will honor Sasha's memory by loving and kindness to others, especially my Bella, who I don't know how I could live without. God bless and keep Sasha! |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Charlotte |
Posted:
|
Nov 27, 2003 |
|
Location:
|
|
|
...I wanted to send you this poem which I thought you might appreciate, it is about the feelings someone has in looking at a home movie of another person who has died...
The poem is by Ted Hughes and it is called "A Short Film":
It was not made to hurt.
It had been made for happy remembering
By people who were still too young
To have learned about memory.
Now it is a dangerous weapon, a time-bomb,
Which is a kind of body-bomb, long-term, too.
Only film, a few frames of you skipping, a few seconds,
You aged about ten there, skipping and still skipping.
Not very clear grey, made out of mist and smudge,
This thing has a fine fuse, less a fuse
Than a wavelength attuned, an electronic detonator
To what lies in your grave inside us.
And how that explosion would hurt
Is not just an idea of horror but a flash of fine sweat
Over the skin-surface, a bracing of nerves
For something that has already happened.
|
|
|
|
Name:
|
Bobbie |
Posted:
|
Jun 20, 2003 |
|
Location:
|
California |
|
| I missed sending my Memorial Day message this year
due to traveling, but Sasha was not forgotten. Every
time we saw a frog statue or frog craft object as we
browsed through shops & art galleries, she came to
mind. I didn\'t realize her attachment to frogs until I
attended her high school graduation. Her cap had a
good size frog sticker on top. Ever since then, frogs are
associated with Sasha in my mind. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Marina |
Posted:
|
May 25, 2003 |
|
Location:
|
Mont Vernon, NH |
|
| I too was feeling blue about not being at Crane\'s Beach yesterday. A warm, sunny day hanging out at Crane\'s would have been soothing. Well, Sasha loved rain. And it rained!
Park and I sorted through lots of pictures this weekend, something that has been hard for us to do. Little by little, we will be posting more sweet pictures and memories.
|
|
|
|
Name:
|
|
Posted:
|
May 24, 2003 |
|
Location:
|
|
|
| Hi Marina,
I just wanted you to know that you, Park, and Nick are always in my thoughts.
I also wanted you to know that my memories of Sasha and her incredible strength are helping me through what has proved to be a really difficult time. I\'ve recently been diagnosed with carcinoma-in-situ of the cervix. I\'m told that this is one of the last stages a cell goes through before it becomes invasive cancer. I have to go in for another biopsy on June 2nd, but the hope is that the last procedure got rid of all of the abnormal cells before they were able to mutate any further.
Thanks for maintaining the web site -- it really, truly means a lot.
I hope this e-mail finds you well.
All my love,
K
|
|
|
|
Name:
|
Peter |
Posted:
|
May 24, 2003 |
|
Location:
|
Cameric, Dorset, England |
|
| Hello Dear Ones, Marina, Park and Nick
You have been a lot on our minds recently, especially as we come up to this day when Sasha left us three years ago. We know that you have plans for the future, and hope that the good memories and all the love you gave Sasha will return to help carry you forward. May a gentle wind fill your sails.
Peter & Barbara |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Jeff |
Posted:
|
May 23, 2003 |
|
Location:
|
Brighton, MA |
|
| I had been planning to take a trip up to Crane Beach this year, but the weather and a postponed trip from last weekend will keep me away. I was sort of blue about it yesterday, but today I realize that being there on that day has no meaning in and of itself. There is something else that is meaningful, and that I realize is with me all days of the year and in all places. With love,
Jeff |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Charlotte Lary |
Posted:
|
May 23, 2003 |
|
Location:
|
Rathmines, Dublin, Ireland |
|
| Just to say that I remember my cousin as it comes up to the anniversary of her death. She is often on my mind as I get older and she stays 22.
We sell Goodnight Moon in the bookshop where I work, and I always think of Anna reading it at the memorial service when I see it (several times a day in fact!).
Sasha, you were very much loved. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
diana |
Posted:
|
Feb 19, 2003 |
|
Location:
|
|
|
Dearest Marina, Park and Nicky,
I'm in England to see my mother - we were talking about you with such warmth last night, over a roaring fire - I came in this morning to check my email, and found Park's pictures of the storm - I feel we are bound close together by invisible strands - one of which is loving memories of Sasha, her courage, your courage and love.
with all my love
Diana |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Bobbie |
Posted:
|
Nov 29, 2002 |
|
Location:
|
California |
|
I always think of Sasha's birthday on Thanksgiving Day.
It is a day I reflect on the memories of the short life of
our only granddaughter. I am fortunate to have been
able to have spent as much time with her as I did since
we live across the country from one another. Some day
I hope to put our many pictures of Sasha together and
make a memorial album so the whole family can enjoy
her time here with us. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Andrew Gray and Charlotte Lary |
Posted:
|
Nov 27, 2002 |
|
Location:
|
Staying with the Walkers in Mount Vernon |
|
In loving memory of Sasha on her birthday. We miss seeing her smile here.
When we were young children we all played together a lot when we were in America, and once when the Walkers came to England. Charlotte especially remembers Sasha's strong opinions and sense of justice.
We wish she was still here.
|
|
|
|
Name:
|
Marina |
Posted:
|
Nov 27, 2002 |
|
Location:
|
Mont Vernon |
|
| Sasha is never far away from my thoughts and she always has and always will hold a special place in my heart. On this day, her birthday, I miss her so much. There is a part of me missing. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Marina |
Posted:
|
Nov 27, 2002 |
|
Location:
|
Mont Vernon |
|
Diana, together with her daughter Tanya and her friend Jinx, was visiting us this summer. We were sitting on the porch when we noticed amazing activity at the hummingbird feeder. A large number of hummingbirds, perhaps as many as six, appeared to be frolicking, tumbling and seemingly playing in the air. It seemed like a grand celebration, a welcome for Diana and Tanya. Up to then,I had never seen more than one, occasionaly two, at the feeder at the same time. I told Diana about other interesting experiences I have had with hummingbirds, including one that fluttered at Sasha's window just before she died, and frogs (Sasha collected all kinds of frog toys and artifacts). Diana related the story of her friends in China which she has since e-mailed to me. It follows...
Their spirits are with us
As the boat neared the harbour, a rare pink dolphin appeared in front of it, and led it towards the harbour entrance. Just before the boat reached the entrance, the dolphin turned round, swam very close to the boat, and then dived.
At dinner one day, a black butterfly landed on the table, and walked slowly up the arm of a young girl. The butterfly walked slowly up to her shoulder, settled there for a while, and then walked down again.
These were two appearances of the spirit of Wang Dongming, a young Chinese computer engineer who was killed in a traffic accident in May, 2001. He came as a dolphin to be with his father, and as a butterfly to be with his cousin. These visits have been a great consolation to Dongming |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Marina |
Posted:
|
Nov 27, 2002 |
|
Location:
|
Mont Vernon |
|
from an e-mail from Jeff Raab early this summer:
...The reason I'm writing is that I fiddle around with music, and one of my
plans for this summer-without-teaching is to record some of my music. I
was going through some things to figure out what songs I should record,
and I realized that I probably didn't ever send you the song I wrote a
few days after Sasha died. If you want, you can post it, but it's not
my best work and it probably won't mean anything to anyone but me. Here
it is.
- Further Archaeology -
Here I stand believing
That life is more than passing time
It used to be deceiving
Wondering why we wait in line
Tell me, Mr. Divine
Was Alexandra wasting time
Did she just take up space here
A place in your mind?
Awaiting grace
The thought is so misleading
That memories stay alive in words
To think a song could take the place of a heartbeat
Is the strangest thing I've ever heard
Tell me, Mr. Divine
Was Alexandra killing time
Did you offer a place here
A story to write?
Awaiting grace
So much time
Wasted on a kiss
Who am I to feel
To feel like this?
Even as you go
You further archaeology
Who am I to live
When you died?
You died.
You died, but I go on and on and on...
And on and on and on...
|
|
|
|
Name:
|
David |
Posted:
|
May 28, 2002 |
|
Location:
|
Maine |
|
| It has been two years since Sasha died. Her spirit and her memory are still with us all each and everyday. I remember each day and try to do a random act of kindness each day in her memory. Thank you, Sasha. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Bobbie |
Posted:
|
May 26, 2002 |
|
Location:
|
California |
|
Tomorrow is Memorial Day. To me, it is a day I'll always
remember Sasha. I can still see the parade coming up
the street and hear the band playing as we filed in for
her memorial service. There were so many loving
rememberances expressed by those who were
present. I hope they too still remember our
grandaughter on Memorial Day. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Nick |
Posted:
|
May 24, 2002 |
|
Location:
|
|
|
I wrote something today about Sasha. It's a bit raw, maybe a bit too honest. And I'm sure I remember most of what happened wrong.
Read it, if you will. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Robin |
Posted:
|
May 24, 2002 |
|
Location:
|
Brighton |
|
2 years.
that piece of my soul is still gone but I share you with all of my students. Right now, 75 teenagers are thinking of you and lighting a candle. Later they will follow up on an old promise or a forgotten/ignored plan with a friend or family member.
thank you, Sasha for cementing the word 'priority' into my mind with true understanding.
te amo siempre. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
sandy rodgers |
Posted:
|
May 20, 2002 |
|
Location:
|
amherst, nh |
|
| I didn't know Sasha but through Hospice and the loss of my 26 year old daughter, Jane, to diabetes after a long illness, Sasha's Mom and I have a lot in common. I love the site. |
|
|
|
Name:
|
Marina |
Posted:
|
Dec 7, 2001 |
|
Location:
|
Mont Vernon, NH |
|
Re Worldwide Candle Lighting(www.compassionatefriends.org)
Candle lighting will be on Sunday, Dec. 9, at 7 p.m.
|
|
|
|
Name:
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Marina |
Posted:
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Nov 27, 2001 |
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Location:
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| On Sasha's birthday, a rose, a frog and a candle. So many memories, so much love. |
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Name:
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Bobbie |
Posted:
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Nov 27, 2001 |
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Location:
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Buena Park, CA |
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I have not visited this site for a few months, but felt it
was a must on Sasha's birthday. It makes me feel so
good reading the lovely things people have to say about
our only granddaughter. We miss her very much, but
have many found memories of the times we spent with
her through the years as she grew from a toddler who
would bring me flowering weeds, to the young college
girl who drove all night from Nevada while on a dig so
she could surprise her parents when they arrived for a
visit with us. She was 3 hours overdue, and we were
very concerned for her safety. What slowed her down
was trying to avoid all of the rabbits on the desert roads.
She couldn't bare the thought of running over any of
them. This is our happy birthday to a very caring, giving
young lady. |
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Name:
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robin |
Posted:
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Nov 27, 2001 |
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Location:
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brighon |
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happy 24th, sash
i love you.
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Name:
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Marina |
Posted:
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Nov 17, 2001 |
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Location:
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Mont Vernon, NH US |
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| Pranav and I have exchanged several e-mails since his entry below, and he has given us permission to retain it. As I told him, I never expected to hear from other than those who knew the site address. It brought tears of joy and sadness to hear from Pranav and to learn about his sister, Priyanka. We have found that there are many interesting coincidences and parallels in our stories. |
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Name:
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Pranav |
Posted:
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Nov 10, 2001 |
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Location:
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Ahmedabad, Guj India |
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Don't know where to start from and I'm sure you must be wondering why a person from India is visiting the site! I don't actually know Sasha (or anyone in your family for that matter) but I do have one thing in common with you. I too have lost a loved member of my family; on May 5 2000 my younger sister passed away, she was only 23 at that time. Today, I was just sitting at my computer and felt like typing some junk in the address bar to see if any such site existed and just typed in 'tagl' and came to your site. Thats how I read about Sasha and contacted you. I don't know what else to say (even though I feel like there are a thousand things I could). It would be nice if you reply to this, I'd love to hear from you. I request you to please remove this entry from your guest book, I put my comments here because I didn't know how else I could contact you.
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Name:
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Robin |
Posted:
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Oct 22, 2001 |
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Location:
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Brighton, MA |
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| Feeling that missing piece more than ever, Sash. |
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Name:
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MaryJo Palermo-Kirsch |
Posted:
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May 26, 2001 |
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Location:
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Pelham, NH US |
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Sasha, I've been thinking about you so much lately, especially on Thursday - Katie's first birthday and your one-year anniversary. I kept wondering if the two of you passed by each other a year ago. Maybe one day, Kate will tell me all about you! Keep sending special messages to your mom. They make her so happy and fill her up with tons of love. Please give my little guy, Kevin, a million kisses and hugs from his mom. And pass on my favorite saying, "I love you buddy. Momma love you. No matter where you are, I'll always love you." Much love, MaryJo mom to Kevin, age 3 to infinity and beyond ... 3/17/97 - 8/14/00 (dx ependymoma brain tumor), Courtney, age 2 & Katie, age 1
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Name:
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Marina |
Posted:
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May 25, 2001 |
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Location:
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Mont Vernon, NH US |
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From Sasha's "Buddha's Little Instruction Book":
"Love in the past is only a memory. Love in the future is a fantasy. Only here and now can we truly love."
I have struggled with this wanting to hold on to the past. But I remind myself of Sasha's words to live each moment to its fullest. Then I remember that the present is comprised of the past and holds the seeds of the future.
Your thoughts and memories remind me of this. Thank you!
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Name:
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Josh S |
Posted:
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May 24, 2001 |
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Location:
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Brookline, MA US |
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| Although I only had the pleasure of hanging out with Sasha a few times over the years, I know that she was so very important to so many people. I wish I could have been able to hang out with her more often, because I could just tell that she was a fun person to be around. My prayers go out to her and her family. |
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Name:
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Adam Schertzer |
Posted:
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May 24, 2001 |
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Location:
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Brighton, MA |
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| I was walking on Newbury street today and I remembered the time that Sasha, Robin and I were there (Banana Republic, fancy salons and expensive parking lots). It is a time I will always remember, and I am grateful for the time I had to spend with her. It was nice to be in a place today that she enjoyed. My thoughts and prayers are with her and her family. |
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Name:
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Michelle Axelson |
Posted:
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May 23, 2001 |
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Location:
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Framingham, MA US |
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Every time I visit this sight my eyes tear up and I tell myself I will add my own words next time. Who am I fooling? If I have learned anything from Sasha's passing it is that no matter how young I am I cannot put things off. I let our college years go by without staying in touch with Sasha, and because of that did not get to say good-bye to her or have a last trip down memory lane to the ridiculous things we did together in elementary school or girl scout camp. I'd give anything for the chance to do that, but since that's not a possibility I do something else. I try my hardest not to put things off until tomorrow, I reach out to rekindle old relationships (thank God for you Robin), and I honor Sasha's memory by waking up and living each day. You will all be in my thoughts tomorrow- be well,
Michelle |
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Name:
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Ryan Miller |
Posted:
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May 22, 2001 |
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Location:
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North Port, FL US |
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| I, too, realized this site was here. And I sure do wish I found it sooner. It's been a long year keeping things to myself, not sharing many thoughts to friends. Sasha was a key player in my life. One who can never be forgotten. She always knew that I wanted to teach, whether it be in or out of a university. I finally applied to private schools around the area, not thinking I would ever even get an interview, because I lack certification. However, I received a call from a school, had an interview, and was offered the job on the spot. Starting in August, I will be a science teacher for 6-8 graders at a private school up in Bradenton, FL. And truthfully, I have Sasha to thank. If I didn't keep hearing her voice in my head.. "Just apply, you can do it. Keep positive, you'll see..." I would never have gotten as far as I did without her nagging me. I know in my heart, she had a hand in this. It has been almost one year since Sasha has passed. And there is not one day that goes by that I do not think of her. There are so many memories I can share, but there isn't enough space. I only know that I lost a piece of myself the day she passed. And I only hope that one day, I will be lucky enough to be with her in heaven. Thanks for all the great times we had together, Sasha. (i.e. the money game!)I love you lots. :) |
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Name:
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Jeff Raab |
Posted:
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May 21, 2001 |
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Location:
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Brighton, MA |
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| As with Sasha's illness, and later her death, I have learned of this site far later than I would have liked. Today is the second day I have cried for her. My favorite memory of Sasha is of her first birthday at Hamilton. She lived in the same building, and I had just met her a few weeks before. Instead of simply giving Sasha her gift, I planted clues around campus so that she could hunt for it and find it herself. A physical plant worker must have thrown out my crumpled piece of paper, assuming it was litter, although it contained one of the vital clues. After searching for that clue to no avail, Sasha came bursting into my room breathless, her eyes bright. I will never forget how wonderful it felt to smile with her. Around this time last year I was hired to teach at Northeastern University in Boston. The memory of Sasha's spirit, alive in me, makes me a better teacher. Whenever I have a tough day in front of a class, I think of what an amazing instructor Sasha would have become, and I work even harder for my students. Even now Sasha teaches me things about the world. With much love, J |
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Name:
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Kat |
Posted:
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May 21, 2001 |
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Location:
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Charlottesvolle, VA |
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I miss and love you, Sasha. So much...
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Name:
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Robin |
Posted:
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May 18, 2001 |
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Location:
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Brighton, MA |
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It has been a while since I last visited this page and I am hit hard by all the beautiful memories and sweet gestures performed in her honor. I try not to think about what was this time last year, and yet there really is no way around it. I look forward to being with Sash again at Crane's Beach. Last year, a random wave soaked Lisa and me from out of nowhere, and we were convinced that that was Sash reminding us how much we hate the ocean and how much she loved it. I am ready for that reminder once more.
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Name:
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Nick Lary |
Posted:
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May 16, 2001 |
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Location:
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Toronto, ON Canada |
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| I remember Sasha's open-mindedness -her willingness to meet my partner Pavel, and to have him included in family gatherings. Thank you Sasha. Uncle Nick |
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Name:
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Michael Cleveland |
Posted:
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May 16, 2001 |
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Location:
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Lyndeborough, NH US |
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I was going through some old papers recently and found Sasha's story about the Lyndeborough lizards. I remember the day she went out to do that story. She was gone for morethan three hours on a day when we had an editorial staff meeting scheduled with company-paid-for pizza. We started the meeting without her and were scoffing up the pizza when she finally arrived. The lizard lady wouldn't let her go. She kept talking and talking and talking and ... Sasha learned more about lizards than she ever wanted to know. The best part was, she was so hungry she ate four pieces of pizza, then apologized for doing so. I still miss her.
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Name:
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Marina |
Posted:
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Apr 26, 2001 |
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Location:
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Mont Vernon, NH US |
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This is a difficult time for us as we approach the year anniversary of Sasha's death. April is the month we found out that chemo was not working, but it is also the month Sasha took a full-time job as staff reporter for The Milford Cabinet. April into May, we are still full of hope and looking into alternative therapies. May, Sasha is unable to continue at The Cabinet and having difficulties caring for her puppy,Binny. Mother's Day, I am given a sweet gift from Sasha and Nick and we make plans to go out to dinner. Instead, Sasha and I go to the emergency room. Mother's Day is the day I find out that Sasha has less than two weeks to live. From that day on, Sasha slips fast. We are with her, at home, until her last breath on May 24.
Park is making a tabletop water fountain as a memorial. It will have space for a frog or two from Sasha's collection, and a place for a candle or flower. At the base there will be river stones. We would like those stones to come from family and friends. Please mail us one if you wish to contribute. We hope to hear from many of you.
Sasha's ashes were scattered at Crane's Beach (north of Boston). This was as she wished. Park, Nick and I will be there on May 24th, weather permitting, for a walk and picnic and to quietly reminisce. Feel free to come.
We have heard from Hamilton College that the memorial fund will help support students attending field school for years to come. We cannot think of a more meaningful way to celebrate Sasha's love of archeology, field school and her professors.
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Name:
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Alexis |
Posted:
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Mar 31, 2001 |
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Location:
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Biddeford, ME |
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| I didn't even know about this site until last night, but I think it is an amazing idea. I'm not really good with words so I all I really want to say is that I miss you and that i love you. |
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Name:
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Marina |
Posted:
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Mar 14, 2001 |
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Location:
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Mont Vernon, NH US |
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| Robin, I hope you don't mind my sharing this: "I have begun the Alexandra Memorial Library in my new classroom! It has been working very well- lots of kids have been taking books out...Sash would approve." I am so touched by this. Over time, many of Sasha's books will find their way into this library. I keep being reminded that Sasha lives on through all of us in so many different ways. |
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Name:
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MaryJo Palermo-Kirsch |
Posted:
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Jan 17, 2001 |
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Location:
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Pelham, NH US |
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I never had the opportunity to meet Sasha personally but through meeting her mom and visiting this web site, I feel as though I got to know a little piece of her. I know she's watching over my little angel, Kevin. I can picture her playing with him; giving him a nickname and making him laugh or say, "Nooo, that's not how you do it!" Marina, thank you for introducing me to your special angel.
Love, MaryJo Proud mom to Kevin, forever 3
- To infinity and beyond ... March 17, 1997 - August 14, 2000 dx bt ependymoma |
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Name:
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Marina Lary Walker |
Posted:
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Dec 4, 2000 |
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Location:
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Mont Vernon, NH US |
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An e-mail from Tanya: I shared your request with my closest friends, those who helped me out this sad year, and I am happy to tell you that I have already heard from Vietnam, Kyrgyz Republic and Turkmenistan that candles will be lit and kindness committed, and everyone has said what a nice way to commemorate someone's life. I love it, it's so Sasha, pulling something good from something sad. I will go to the Russian church here, and light a candle, and give some money to these poor dignifed old ladies begging on the street. The church is a classic Russian one, set in a park, a place that would feel familiar to you and Sasha (if not a place where you would feel at home!) and a follow-up : I went to the church but it was closed ( i thought Sasha would find that funny) so I folded money up and put it into the wall, hopefully a beggar will find it. Also 'dropped' money in a very poor cab and put some old clothes out near the garbage where I'm sure they'll be taken. love t |
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Name:
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Marina Lary Walker |
Posted:
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Dec 4, 2000 |
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Location:
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Mont Vernon, NH US |
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| Thank you for all the messages both on and off site. Park and I were especially touched knowing that many candles were lit and many acts of kindness were committed in Sasha's memory. Your caring and actions gave meaning to Sasha's birthday. I know that some of us felt awkward in our attempts at kindness. I, for one, need a lot more practice! Sasha, you make me grow even now, perhaps even especially now. My plans were thwarted as workmen were busily installing a Christmas tree and decorations in the location where I had planned to leave an envelope. After some hesitation, I decided to come back early next morning. I did not come early enough! There was plenty of activity around the town green, and a workman had already arrived. Fortunately, he was focused on disentangling lights at the other end of the green. Pretending to feel self-confident while being scrutinized by a man pumping gas, I marched up to the gazebo and placed the envelope on the Christmas tree for someone to find (the man pumping gas???the workman???). There is another day of remembrance coming up. Compassionate Friends, an international support group for bereaved parents and siblings, has designated the 2nd Sunday in December as a children's memorial day. On Dec. 10, family and friends will be lighting candles at 7 p.m. around the world. The light will spread from one time zone to the next. Again, I invite you to participate. With thanks and with love, Marina |
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Name:
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Grandma |
Posted:
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Dec 2, 2000 |
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Location:
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Buena Park, CA US |
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| On her birthday Monday, I was remembering our first wisit with Sasha, and our last visit with her. She was about nine months old during the first visit. We spent a good part of that visit aboard our boat in Dana Point Harbor. She took to boating life right away and proved to be a good little sailor. On an overnight trip down the coast, she slept whenever the engine was running, and loved climbing the stairs between the cabin and the cocpit when she was awake. Our last visit with her was, coincidently, aboard a boat. We were with the family in the Caribbean in February. Sasha spent a lot of time curled up on a big berth we put together in the dining area just inside the cabin door where she could take part in our conversations either in the cabin or in the cockpit. She had some wonderful moments snorkeling in a cave full of awesome fish (her words) and enjoying life and scenery on the islands. One of the most touching events I remember was when Marina and I were fixing lunch while underway. The water was choppy and Sasha was resting on the big berth. Both Marina and I became queazy. Sasha shooed us out of the galley and proceded to fix lunch for all of us. She had fun sprinkling our sanwiches with Caribbean spices, putting together interesting combinations of flavors. Needless to say, Marina and I were very gratefull. Again, she proved to be a good little sailor. We wanted to do something in her memory for her birthday. When we heard our local food bank was in dire need, we decided to celebrate her birthday by donating to this worthy cause. Rest in peace little sailor. |
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Name:
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Mary Crawford Booher |
Posted:
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Nov 28, 2000 |
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Location:
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Duvall, WA |
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| Happy birthday Sasha. I am so sorry that we never met. Seeing that my dad is your dad's uncle, that made us 1st cousins, once removed. Since today would have been your birthday, I would like to share a poem with your parents that I found when my first baby was born 3 years ago. I am sorry that I did not note the author. My Sweet Baby I will rock you , my sweet baby, Before the socccer games and ballet lessons. Before the swim team and band practice. Before you are too big to sit in my lap and nuzzle. Before your feet take you where you are meant to go. I will rock you, My sweet baby. |
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Name:
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Michael Cleveland |
Posted:
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Nov 27, 2000 |
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Location:
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Lyndeborough, NH US |
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| I knew Sasha only briefly, the few months that she worked for The Cabinet, but all of it was fun. Every time I order tea via the internet I think of her; she was appalled to learn that I didn't know how. She is missed here. |
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Name:
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Peter and Barbara Lary |
Posted:
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Nov 27, 2000 |
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Location:
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Isle of Purbeck, Dorset England |
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| Dear All Sasha, from this distance in space we did not know as well as we would have liked. But the contact we had with her has left a lasting, deep impression of a person who had already given a lot to the world, and somehow seems able to continue doing so even after she has left us. On this special day we lit our candle for Sasha, the random act of kindness still has to be done when the time is right. It's a wonderful idea. Thank you Love from Peter and Barbara Peter adds:- We were at the Walkers last May the 1st, my birthday, and due to fly back here the next day. There was a surprise birthday supper for me that evening in true Walker style, with an assortment of beautifully wrapped presents around my plate. There was one bottle labelled "Ass in the Tub Hot Sauce" which caused particular amusement, and which I think Sasha had a hand in choosing! I normally use it sparingly, however today, not thinking at that moment that it was Sasha's birthday, I sprinkled a few drops of the hot sauce into my lunchtime soup. |
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Name:
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Tanya |
Posted:
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Nov 27, 2000 |
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Location:
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Almaty, Kazakstan |
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| I am Sasha's cousin, presently working far away from home. It's her birthday here already although not quite yet in America. I remember the day of her birth (also my mother's birthday) the excitement of a new cousin, and what a sweet baby she was. I also remember her pride when Nick was born, and the way she looked after him like a mini-mother. Sasha and Lisa came up to Ottawa to visit me 2 years ago, in the fall, a glorious clear weekend of autumn colours, walks in the city, museums and chats. She bought a bottle of champagne, wonderful extravagance, and enjoyed the relative richness of the American in Canada. She was in her final year at university and trying to sort out the many choices ahead of her. She and Lisa amused me with tales of Sasha making her college friends practice using ancient digging tools, and I realized what a rigorous, analytical and fun intelligence she had. The last time I saw her in February was hard, because she was very tired. We spent a lot of time in the kitchen in the Bini-restriction zone. Sasha was a lower energy version of herself, curious about my work and travels, eager to get out, to travel, to work, but also trying hard (and succeeding) to be patient about being sick. We spoke a couple of times in April when she was already working, and her enthusiasm and confidence in the work came through. She was so engaged in life, in other people, in study, in trying to get better, even at such a difficult time, and that I think is the most important thing I learned from her. |
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Name:
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David |
Posted:
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Nov 23, 2000 |
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Location:
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Mont Vernon, NH US |
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I have been here often but have never been capable of writing anything. But here we are, at Sasha's house, celebrating Thanksgiving, thankful that we had her for the time that we did. And with her birthday approaching, remembering what she gave to us. I, too, will do a random act of kindness in her memory. Happy birthday, Sasha!
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Name:
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Nick Lary |
Posted:
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Nov 21, 2000 |
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Location:
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Toronto, ON Canada |
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As Sasha's birthday approaches, I think of Marina's wish that Sasha be commemorated through some random act of kindness. It is a wonderful way of showing that our memory of Sasha is a living and growing one. She was a lovely, gentle, thoughtful person.
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Name:
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Marina Walker |
Posted:
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Nov 6, 2000 |
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Location:
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Mont Vernon, NH US |
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| November 27th - Sasha's birthday. I will try my best not to be sad, but instead to celebrate the wonderful moments we had. I plan to place a rose, a frog and a candle on our dining table. Park and I will light the candle sometime in the evening. My gift will be a random act of kindness in her memory. Sasha enjoyed this concept, which can be as simple as paying for someone's cup of coffee, anonymously. I invite you to participate. |
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Name:
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Robin |
Posted:
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Oct 3, 2000 |
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Location:
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Brighton, MA |
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| Sasha and I had a strange connection which few people really have with one another. We could read each other's thoughts....We knew, instinctively, when the other was not okay....We always remembered to end conversations/letters with the three most precious words in the world: I love you. The fact that I can't hear her voice say those words to me hurts like nothing else I have ever felt before.I miss you, Sash. You were a beautiful person and the best friend I could ever ask for. |
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Name:
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Park Walker |
Posted:
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Sep 30, 2000 |
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Location:
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Mont Vernon, NH US |
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The following is a message that Sasha sent out to people on April 4, 2000:
so i had the ct scan this morning. in the words of my oncologist: "the treatment is not working."
not the news we were hoping for.
good news: the tumors in my liver have stayed the same. bad news: the tumors in my lungs have grown and spread. what this means: my encounter with the gemcitobine experiment is now over. there are no good options for the next step. i can either jump on the protocol for a phase one study, which is a last ditch effort, or i can try arethromyacin (or something like that), which works about as well as everything else does for liver cancer (i.e. not so well at all). chances are, i'll give that a whirll, experience baldness for a while and then see what happens. we would like for something (anything!) to stop the tumors from growing. we're also looking into clinics that offer traditional chemo combined with nutrition, herbs, etc.
so there it is. just keeps getting better, doesn't it??
anyone else feel like climbing to the top of a mountain and screaming "IT JUST ISN'T FAIR!!"?? but then, who ever said it was going to be?
on the up side, everything is turning green and beautiful, binny is the best puppy in the whole world and i'm thinking about going to check out niagra falls - because, hey, i've always wanted to see niagra falls. well, that and italy, alaska, and a few dozen other places that are a lot further than the falls. so the falls it is!! oh - and i have an interview at a local newspaper this thursday. so maybe i'll be able to use my brain again in the near future.
side note: did you see on the news that chemo LOWERS YOUR INTELLIGENCE??? i mean, come on. a girl can only take so much!
love and huge hugs to all.
-sasha
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Name:
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Marina L. Walker |
Posted:
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Sep 27, 2000 |
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Location:
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Mont Vernon, NH USA |
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During one of her chemotherapy treatments at Dana Farber, a volunteer came around with a cart of supplies to make a card. Sasha drew a picture and inside, she wrote:"Life is comprised of moments woven together. Each moment, good or bad,contributes to the whole. No light without dark. No dusk without dawn. No good without bad. Live each moment to its fullest. Live."
As much as she could, she made each moment count. I love you, Sasha. |
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